Angry Video Game Nerd II: ASSimilation

ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS!
This one is run and gun platformer. Well... I remember I've played the first AVGN game and it sucked ass. Sucked so bad that I refunded it. Let's see if the second game is better or not. It is better, but not that much. 

Let's start with the plot. This time AVGN stuff was stolen and everyone is turned into a monster.No James needs to collect the 6 pieces of the Sexforce in order to restore the world.There is also Nostalgia Critic who tries to steal the glory from James.

Gameplay. There are 5 levels 3 stages + BOSS fight, final level consists of 1 level and BOSS fight. You need to navigate and shoot your way till you see a detonator to blow up the level. Since it's AVGN game it is full of cheap one shot killing bullshit, hordes of monsters and decent platforming. It would be decent if enemies and oneshot bullshit didn't ruin it for you. I mean I assume you know who's AVGN and what he went through playing shitty unbalanced games from 1980 to 2000. So when he became popular and wealthy enough he shat out several games so others can feel the same pain he did.

ANyway you have your pew-pew shooter which is NES zapper. There are also other items that will somehow makes this turd game feels slightly more tolerable.There are Power glove (let's you crush stone blocks), NES Dancing pad (Glide for gliding) Nintendo helmet, sorry forgot the name (let's you see hidden platforms and items), loafers (wall jumping) and turbo pad which is bullshit it doesn't give you turbo shot instead it is charge shot. Apart from regular platforming levels there are side scrollers and underwater levels. Enemies are not hard to deal with if you just fight one flat ground. But combining with shitty platforming (+ difficulty you pick) it will turn in quite frustrating experience. I mean Nerd can shoot in all direction and there is a lock in place button. But more often you'd have to neglect it due to circumstances. There are also other collectibles and items. You can collect 4 NES cartridges in each none boss stage, but that shit doesn't do anything it's just for achievement. The other items are health pick ups and secondary weapon. There are 3 secondary items. Stones, bombs and beer kegs. First two are nearly useless and bear keg restore full health. It is useful even on harder difficulties.

Now we at the point where my main gripe is. Difficulty and no turbo shot. I advice you not to pick hard and harder difficulties in order to avoid damage to your fun. I've played it on Hard and regret it a little bit. All due to imbalanced bullshit, the classic know as sponge enemies (Plus less health containers and fewer lives). That especially annoying on bosses. I'm stuck on final boss all because I can't repeat perfect cycle like a robot and turbo bind on my gamepad. Seriously don't play on hard without at least a turbo bind. So Final boss is kinda like first phase of Sonic&Knuckles final boss. It starts first by tracking your with its hands and slamming you. about 20% of the health bar later a pipe appears in the upper right corner. From that pipe an infinite number of enemies start to spawn. So now you have to deal with two things. It wouldn't be so bad if they didn't take so many shoots to kill (the numbers of them is also way too big). That's why you need a turbo bind on shoot button. So far I'm 30 tries in and I feed up to the brim with this bullshit. AVGN games are cursed to be the same shit he used to play and review. I give it couple of more attempts but I won't go overboard for it, it's worth it. 

BGM: Sure nes like pseudo "8 bit" music is more enjoyable that usual forgettable ambiance but I didn't find ant bangers in this game that I would download and listen on my phone/PC.

Overall: I'll be in the middle on play or skip on this one. Sure it's hood enough game to familiarize yourself with AVGN but you won't lose anything by skipping it. There is still one more AVGN game available on Steam.